I grew up in West Vancouver in a very positive and loving environment. I always felt a strong sense of angst, emptiness and feelings of not belonging despite all the support. These feeling that I was unable to cope with lead me to start using drugs and alcohol in an unhealthy and destructive way. The abuse of these substances took me down a rabbit hole of despair and emptiness. Everything lacked colour and meaning. I had no purpose and no respect for my self. I felt like I had fried my brain.
With the help of my family, I took a chance to get off these substances and decided to go to the Last Door. Despite the initial feelings of extreme discomfort and blurry memories of the first week, the 7 months that I lived there was amongst the best moments of my life. The staff were great role models and gave great wisdom and advice for which I still use today. I meet amazing friends and peers forged from mutual respect and trust, something that I always wanted but I was never able to obtain. Literally, for the first time in my life, I felt like I could be myself without being consumed the fear of judgement. The program and the supports I made nudged me to start to become comfortable in my own skin, something that I thought was a myth, impossible to achieve.
Today I stay involved with the Last Door, to both show my gratitude, but also as it gives me great satisfaction to be there and participate in the positive energy coming out of that place. My life isn’t perfect, neither am I free from negative emotions, but with the skills, I have learned from the Door with the supports I made there I can keep on moving forward and live each day to the fullest.
Super grateful and thankful to the door,
Clean Date July 15 2018