It Will Never Happen to Me

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Dr Claudia Black: Addiction in the family

This “little green book,” as it has come to be known to hundreds of thousands of C.O.A.’s and A.C.O.A.’s, is meant to help the reader understand the roles children in alcoholic families adopt, the problems they face in adulthood as a result, and what they can do to break the pattern of destruction.

It Will Never Happen to Me is a line spoken by all who have been raised in a family where one or both parents have a problem with addiction. In addictive families, most children move through adolescence appearing to survive the problems and hardships of life. They abide by the laws; Don’t Talk—Don’t Trust—Don’t Feel. As resilient as children are, their survival techniques frequently contribute to a variety of problems in adulthood among them depression, inability to maintain intimate relationships, marrying an addict, or becoming addicted.

While recognizing alcohol as the primary addiction within families, this book broadens the concepts to include addictive disorders such as other drugs, money related addictions, food disorders, relationships, sex, and work addictions and expands upon the family rules and roles, family violence and shame.

Dr. Claudia Black is a renowned author, speaker, trainer and internationally recognized for her work with family systems and addictive disorders. Claudia believes there are many pathways to recovery from addiction and one of those ways is for adult children to be taking a look of their own addiction issues and some pathways are for parents to have their own recovery from their child’s addiction since it can effect the whole family and they need to have their own recovery. Dr. Black was asked when the right time is to talk to your kids about drugs, alcohol and addiction as a parent and Dr. Claudia Black said the right time is when they are very young. She stated there is no right way of parenting but some kids can be exposed to the possibility of using when they are eight, nine, or ten years of age and she also mentions that research shows that kids respond positively when parents have open discussions including about addiction.

Dr. Black speaks about how it is common for young adults who might live away from their parents have secretes and they have a relationship all over text if they live away at  school or something, then they come home for the holidays and they are struggling with depression and they are struggling with anxiety and they are in the need to use drugs and are in addiction. When asked what a parent should do who is in early recovery and has young kids and how to handle parenting and recovery together, Dr. Black says that the parent needs to embrace their recovery first and foremost, because without their recovery they will not be a good parent, if addiction runs your life, you will not be a good parent. Dr. Black says that a parent is modeling two main things when being in recovery, first of all they are showing that it is okay to ask for help and there is no shame in that, also that people can change, go from someone who is in addiction to be in recovery and change is possible even if it is from something as serious as addiction.

For more information or to purchase this book, visit the Claudia Black Library at Central Recovery Pres

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Talk Recovery airs live every Thursday at noon on 100.5 FM, Vancouver Coop Radio. The Last Door produces this weekly radio show discussing the many pathways to addiction recovery. To end stigma we must continue to talk about recovery. Talk Recovery is in its 7th Season, Hundreds of guests, thousands of listeners, thank you. Show ideas? Email community@lastdoor.org

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