My story is like most that have come into recovery. I pretty well destroyed everything around me that mattered. My family didn’t want anything to do with me. My friends were sick of me stealing and lying to them and losing countless jobs due to stealing and not coming into work at all. Early on in my addiction to drugs and alcohol I was able to keep a control of them (having my family and friends and a steady job).That was in my early twenties.
As I got into my early thirties my drug and alcohol abuse was full blown. I stole and lied to everyone in my life. I abandoned my daughter at 14 years old. I chose drugs and alcohol over everything. In the end I became homeless and destitute.I don`t know why I wanted to change my life cause I have tried to get clean many times before and I ended up using again and again.
I think I was so tired of living in lies and deceit. I truly wanted to change. I heard from a woman in the program who I admire after hearing her speak at a 12 step meeting. She said your bottom is when you stop digging. I truly believe I have.
A friend of mine who I grew up with was about a year and a half in the program and had gone through Last Door. He told me it changed his life. I told him I was going to another treatment center. He asked if I wanted to go to this place. It will get you clean and show you a new way to live. I said yes. He gave me words of advice when I got there. He told me to shut up, listen and do what I’m being suggested and your life will change for the better. When I got there I was scared. I have never been in a treatment center before. I have done detox but not treatment. There were so many people in such a good mood and so talkative but I was so shy I didn’t want to come out of my room. That soon changed as the guys in the house made me feel welcome and apart of. Shortly I made some friends and I started to come out of my shell.
I started to learn about myself, this was through doing the written exercises Last Door provides. They changed my life. I was able to care for myself again and others around me. Today I live a more spiritual life. I am still me. I have some tough days but I don`t have to use drugs or alcohol to get through them. I am building a relationship back with my daughter and my family. I live one day at a time. I try not to complicate things. I look up to the people who have significant amount of clean time. I watch and listen. I am shown what to do. They guide through the road of recovery. I thank everyone at the Last Door. I love the staff to no end. We have some great laughter .Sometimes at my expense. It is all in good fun. Stay clean everybody.