My name is Jimmy and I am an addict. I live in Terrace B.C. and my life was saved after I flew to New Westminster, walked down the side walk, stumbled up the walk and entered in “The Last Door”. My addiction introduced me to demons like obsession, denial, isolation, compulsion and self pity. I was a father to five beautiful children in name only. I was a husband to a wonderful wife in name only, a son and brother in title only. I lived a selfish life of drug abuse and obsessive loneliness. I dug myself deeper and deeper into an obsessive pit of getting, using, and finding ways and means to get more.
At the start of my active addiction I carried on a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde dichotomy of a church going father, husband and ethical human being. The other side which at first I kept well hidden was a paranoid, drug induced comma like state of shame and obsession. As time passed – getting drugs, using drugs and getting more drugs became priority in my life over all other responsibilities. Rock bottom came to me in the form of an overdose and deteriorating health; both mentally and physically.
My pleading prayer and the prayers of those who love me were answered on June 17, 2009 when I arrived at the “Last Door” and into the care of both staff and brothers who loved me until I could love myself. The Last Door taught me to learn from my addiction and crave my recovery. I was shown that honesty, open mindedness and willingness will give me the opportunity to learn from those who got it and teach to those who want it.
I learned at Last Door that laughing and fun are an essential and effective part of recovery. I learned that working a 12 step program and going to meetings and finding a sponsor would give me the tools to live a life of serenity, sanity and recovery. The guys at Last Door laid out for me a map, one end was my active addiction and the other end was the ability and the gift of living clean and living life on life’s terms. I was given the directions to get where I needed to go by those at Last Door who had travelled that road before me.
Today I can look in the mirror and I can love, respect and be proud of what I see. Today I am a father to my kids a husband to my wife, a son to my Pop and a brother to my sisters. God gave me the gift of “Last Door” and in turn I can live as a productive member of society and share a passion for recovery as was shared with me by those who were also given that gift. I recently had the opportunity to celebrate one year of being clean and serene, a celebration of the accomplishment of many and evidence to others that the program of recovery works if you work it.
My family and I thank God every single day for “Last Door” and the Door boys who walk through that door today and those who have walked through it in the past.